You Say Tomato, I Say Tomaaatoe

The other day at the gym, the same guy that asked me to coffee to hang out with his fiance and her friends worked out beside me again. We were on the treadmill and I had worked up a pretty good sweat,  so I definitely was not in the mood to go out afterward. I just wanted a shower and to come home and relax.

As he stepped off his treadmill he asked me if I would like to join him and his buddies for happy hour. I was thinking to myself, does this guy not have any friends that he can hang out with? Why does he keep asking a stranger to tag along? But I also remembered one of our first conversations when I told him that I was new in town and that I didn’t have a social life. So then my thoughts turned from wonder, back to thoughts that most people are just friendly given the chance.

I told him that I wasn’t in the mood to go out and that I didn’t drink. He smiled and joked that this was a good thing because on some nights he and his friends could use a sober buddy to censor their behavior and to also taxi them home. I thanked him again for the invite but told him that I wasn’t in the mood to go out. I then pointed out two guys in a corner and said that I had seen them in here before, maybe he could get them to go out.

He then said and I quote “Oh, those guys are fags”. The “f” word made a gonging sound that reverberated through my head. It actually echoed and pushed against my brain matter. Making the conversation even more unbearable he said “I don’t mind faggidity (is that even a word), but you know it was going to be a guys night out”.

I then told him that what he said wasn’t very nice and he apologized saying something like “oh yeah, that wasn’t very politically correct of me, was it”.

I told him that it was indeed brutal, rude, and uneducated. I then said, “you know, only a spade could call himself a spade and even then it can be insulting”.

Again he said something about not having anything against the gay lifestyle, but he used the word “homosexness”. He even said he just leaves most gay people alone.

So I said “well then I’m a spade”.

This comment flew right over his head. After I had said this, he said something like “hey you are actually up to a light jog on this thing, good for you”. And he looked over the bar/protector and checked to see how far I had gone.

“Almost up to five miles, awesome” he said in a congratulatory tone.  “Alright, if you change your mind, my buddies and I will be at ———- across from the mall”.

He gave me a high five and then walked out of the gym. As he did, I saw him glance at the two guys working out together. I am not sure if many of you remember, but one of the guys was a guy from one of my posts (in the old blog). He was the guy that kept trying to start a conversation with me (the one with the beautiful eyes), but I was trying to stay under the radar and didn’t reciprocate.

As I walked out, Mr. Beautiful Eyes smiled and told me to have a good evening. His buddy whispered (but audibly) “Eeew he’s so short and a bit chunky”. I stopped, kept myself from walking over and knocking him out, and then went out the door.  As I passed by the window, I smiled again at Mr. Beautiful Eyes and waved. He smiled again and waved back.

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11 Responses to “You Say Tomato, I Say Tomaaatoe”

  1. Steven Says:

    I am not even going to comment about the straight guy and what he said, I think we have heard it all by now and it is nice that their women let them out of their cages in the morning. It must have been hard for you as a closeted gay man to make that stand, very brave buddy, so proud of you. How ironic then that one of the gay men who you were defending, made a childish remark towards you. I find it so hypocritical of the gay culture to run around saying “don’t judge me” and yet judge each other so harshly based on race, weight, age, height, hair color, eye color etc.

  2. David Says:

    At least one of the three sounds like a decent individual. There was something came across not too long ago. I can’t remember who said it or where it was but basically it read, that you don’t have to look very far to see what what a person is really like–they’ll tell you.

  3. Lemuel Says:

    I hope that you and Mr. Beautiful Eyes keep smiling. 😉 You both brighten all of our worlds. Kudos to you for standing up to Treadmill Guy and thumbs down on Mr. SuperGay for his critical remarks of you. I wonder if he would have spoken up to Treadmill Guy on behalf of the Family.

  4. "Joe" Says:

    You go, Bro! Thank you for standing up for yourself and for me and for all of us. Keep looking and waving.

  5. Steven (Oz) Says:

    Good for you that you stood your ground. But high-fives are so passe. 🙂

  6. matty03 Says:

    You rock! I hate gym interactions. I always have and I always will.

  7. Steven(OH) Says:

    I think that you can change your blog name from “open a window” to “Door is open”. It is becoming a natural thing for you to live whatever you like. All the possibilities follow.

  8. somewherejoe Says:

    Between the treadmill clod and the snarky fag, looks like a socialogical wash, heh. That leaves Mr. Beautiful Eyes, who seems, as goldilocks said, ‘just right…”

  9. BruceCleveland Says:

    All I have to say is…Good for you!!! I am so proud of you. And you handled it much better than I would have. My comment to him when saying they were faggots, would have been “Well that makes three of us…enjoy your guys night out.”

    I am not too surprised that your comment went over his head…but the point is you said it and you stood up to his stupidity.

    And don’t pay attention to gossipy little queens…you’re cute wether you know or not…and no mean spirited gym rat can change that!

  10. Doug Says:

    You have willpower, that’s for sure.

    I don’t react well to things like that (either the str8 guy or the asshole gay guy). My adrenalin starts pumping. So I’d have yelled at the str8 guy, and then I’d have yelled at and possibly attacked the asshole.

    Yeah, I need to work on my temper.

    The next time you see the str8 guy, make a pass at him and see what happens. 😉

  11. Patrick Says:

    Wow, John, we’ve all had to deal with clueless homophobes and judgemental, bitchy gay guys, but I’m not sure I’ve ever heard of someone having to deal with both in such quick succession. Give yourself credit for handling both events with such aplomb.

    And I second the hope that you let yourself get to know Beautiful Eyes.

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