A Little Burden Lifted

I had a rough week right before Easter. I didn’t get accepted into a family medicine training program. This is something I have been striving to achieve for the last couple months, so on Tuesday when they announced those medical students who matched into programs, I was depressed.

But I had some things to look forward to. My family coming in on the weekend to celebrate Easter with me. Another surprise that I had to look forward to is my buddy Todd (I have written about him before) coming down in April to do one of his medical rotations here (so I will have his company for a month).

I called him really late one night, after I had gotten off the computer. I took the chance that he would be awake and called him. He answered right away explaining that he was up studying. I’m not really one to verbalize my disappointment so I talked about everything else under the sun. After I hung up with him (about 3 a.m.), my phone rang and it was him again. He said something didn’t sit well with our conversation, he could just feel something was wrong and demanded to know. He asked things like “are you going to be alone for Easter”, “did you get into a fight with someone” and then finally said “dammit don’t make me guess, I do enough guessing on my exams”.

It is often funny how those close to you can sense something different about your voice pattern no matter how you try to hide it. I had talked to several people that week and thought I did a good job hiding my disappointment.  I talked to people the night that the results came out and even fooled some of my other friends. In fact I thought I had even fooled myself, constantly reassuring myself that everything was going to be alright. The funny thing is, I rarely talk to Todd, at least not on a weekly basis. I guess there are some things you cannot hide from your friends who you do have a deep emotional bond to.

I really believe that friends are those angels that lift you to your feet when your own wings have forgotten how to fly.

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9 Responses to “A Little Burden Lifted”

  1. Sam Says:

    sorry you didn’t get into the program you were working on man. I’m sure there must be lots of opportunities in your field?

  2. Lemuel Says:

    Isn’t that great! Friends like your Todd are priceless gems – those who hold you in their heart and won’t take any crap from you. Hold onto him!

    I am sorry that you did not make the program you wanted. Is there another that is a second choice?

  3. urspo Says:

    i know from experience that disappointed med students can nevertheless get where they want to go in the end. sometimes it takes a few more steps – so if it is something you still want, then see where you are going next as merely a stepping stone, not ‘the final verdict’.

  4. atomicpop! Says:

    sorry you didn’t get into that program, but sounds like you have a helluva good friend…

  5. ink2metal Says:

    hey john,

    tough break on not getting into the program but i’m sure you’ll find something else in the mean time. life is weird like that. you may actually get into something you didn’t expect but enjoy even more.

    anyway, at least you know you have a good friend that you can talk to about those disappointments. i myself tend to keep my disppointments internalized. i always feel like it’s just going to unintentionally burden someone else for no reason. but i have a few good friends too that are always willing to take some of that burden off me.

    yay for good friends!

  6. Steven Says:

    I’m sorry to hear that you didn’t get accepted into the program. That is their loss. But you will get accepted somewhere and that will be everyone’s gain. I’m glad to see you observing this as a little burden and your closing statement is priceless. 😀

  7. "Jpe" Says:

    Sad news. Disappointment can be really hard for me to bear. Sometimes we take it too close to heart. It is not a measure of your worth, but the chance for a new beginning. But it still feels like shit in the mean time!

    A friend is someone who will be honest with us. To tell the truth may be the greatest love.

  8. Steven Says:

    On the positive side here, you guys always seem to have that very cool ESP friendship connection between you, I hope you stay in touch forever.

    On the placement side, I know you will work through this somehow.

  9. Steve Rebooted Says:

    Yeah, friends can sense things. Sorry you didn’t get into the program.

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