I finally met someone. Our meeting wasn’t accidental, it was a blind date. My friend Josh set me up with his neighbor. Josh and I have been hanging out together for about two months now. I’ve been going out with him, his boyfriend Ben and my friend Mike (who until a few months ago was completely closeted). We became this unseparable foursome, going to get coffee together on a daily basis and on the weekends going to bars to hang out.
Two weeks ago, Josh told me that he was chatting with his newly single neighbor Andrew. He asked if I would mind being set up and I told him no. If Josh knew this person and would trust him to be a good set-up for me, then why not?
Andrew and I hit it off right away. I was constantly laughing and smiling around him. I couldn’t help myself. His own laugh and smile were contagious. When he asked me out for dinner, Josh must have prepped him because before I could answer, he said “you know no one knows where they will be tomorrow…but you’ve laid the foundation for your career so play a little”. Josh must have told him that I’ve often hidden behind my studies and medical school as an excuse not to live my extra-curricular life.
After our first official date, just the two of us, in a waterfront restaurant he asked me if he could call me “tomorrow”. I told him yes. That night a little after midnight my cell phone rang. When I answered it he said “it’s tomorrow”. Since that phone call I’ve worn out my smile. I don’t think I’ve laughed or smiled this much in a long time.
Since that phone call, we have eaten dinner together every night. We’ve had coffee and dessert in sidewalk cafes. I’ve spent nights under the stars on walks and on balconies talking about everything. I’ve told Andrew things I’ve never told anyone before–about my fears, my hopes and dreams. It’s been a whirlwind of two weeks. I understand how people can fall in love so quickly (although I’m not quite at the love stage just yet).
And now, I find out that I need to go north to push my career along. These plans have been months in the making. The seed that I planted has begun to sprout. If I let my heart make a decision, it would be to stay here and see where this relationship is going to go. However, my mind trumps my heart everytime and I know that I’ve got to go.
I’m scared of good-bye’s definition.