Things haven’t been going so well lately for me. Just some personal bumps in my journey through life. It’s the main reason I haven’t been posting lately. I knew that if I came here to post, I would write it all down. It’s not that I don’t want to share, but I know that thinking about what to write would entail thinking about these hurdles and bumps and glitches. So I didn’t.
I’ve hidden behind a smile. No one at work knows anything is wrong. In fact yesterday, a co-worker asked me “do you ever not smile”? I told her that I do, but it’s easier to smile than not. At least for me it is. To pretend nothing is wrong is easy, isn’t it?
I just came back from visiting Andrew. It was really good seeing him again. I really needed a hug from him and getting the hundreds he gave me this weekend certainly helped. Just being with him blurrred out all the other stuff I didn’t want to think about. And it helped to talk about all those glitches, hurdles and bumps. I talked to him daily about them on the phone, but leaning on his shoulder helped more than just voicing it all out over the phone.
So now I’m back somewhat….the smile a little more authentic. And I know that I’m going to be alright.