I Am What I Am and That Is A Prude

My buddy Brian and I went to the gym a few days ago. Summer is coming, in fact summer is here (as of today) and both of us want to get into shape. He’s already in shape, but since his break-up he has been more critical of his body. Personally I don’t think he has left himself go, but try telling that to someone who will be going to one of the Pride celebrations soon.

While I was on the treadmill, this guy started stretching in front of me (and I know this sounds like the prelude to some gosh awful flick). At one point he arched his back against the wall and put his hands above his head and stayed stretched like that for about five minutes. And then he looked me right in the eye and smiled. This whole act had the opposite effect. Rather than turning me on, I was disgusted. He kept smiling and trying to engage me in flirtatious body language banter. I tried to ignore him, but of course (yes he had a great body) I couldn’t turn away.

So to get him to quit bothering me, I mouthed “pit stain” and pointed to my armpit. He mouthed back “what”? And I gestured again. He again looked at me quizically and said “what”? So I gestured again. This time with a cheshire smile he mouthed come here and tell me. I shook my head and said aloud “dude you’ve got a huge pit stain”. He looked away embarassed and stalked off.

Brian who had watched the whole interaction said to me later that this was not the way to flirt, that I had to be nicer.


6 Responses to “I Am What I Am and That Is A Prude”

  1. Tim Says:

    I don’t know, JM. No offense to Brian and call me old-fashioned, but I think there’s a world of difference between flirting and hitting on somebody. My partner and I are both inveterate flirts and love when others flirt with us–because it’s harmless on both sides. It’s a fun way to get to know people better and say nice things about them to their faces without crossing any uncomfortable lines.

    I’m always flattered when somebody (male, female, gay, straight–it doesn’t matter) flirts with me. But, like you, when it’s obvious that I’m getting indirectly propositioned, I’m completely turned off. If you flirt with me first and then throw out a suggestion, however, chances are I’ll be so engaged that I’ll have no problem politely saying no. No harm, no foul.

    It sounds like this guy was doing some kind of weird mating strut for your benefit and I imagine it’s worked in the past. Too bad for him that you are what you are, which isn’t a prude, but a nice guy who’s too smart and self-respecting to fall for it. Bravo!

  2. Peter Says:

    Some guys are just show-offs…

  3. Urspo Says:

    sometimes when I am being blatantly hit upon, I shake my head ‘no’ or vocalize ‘thank you no but I am not interested’. Limits and direct nos save time and trouble.

  4. Rob Says:

    You should be flattered that he thought your were attractive enough to flirt with. I agree with Brian….you should have let him down easier.

  5. Steven Says:

    There’s a time and a place for something like this to occur and obviously it took the guy a long time to realize that “now was not the time.” And this does not make you a prude at all.

  6. Jim Says:

    Prude, no. Smart, focused and know what you want, yes. He wasnt a 12 year old girl, so there was no need to sugar-coat a clear “not interested, move on”.

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