A Date

I haven’t been on a date in a long time…until this weekend. It is the first date I have been on since the love of my life passed away.

I met this guy on an app. And we have been exchanging texts for a while and then that turned into phone calls. The phone calls would last a couple hours. He was respectful and let me take my time. He knew my history and was patient.

He finally asked if we could have dinner. And we did. The dinner lasted for a couple hours. We talked for quite a bit. It felt good to be out again. It also was a bit sad for me. I miss my partner so much. I wished it was him sitting across from me. But I also realized that I do need to get back out there. I get lonely. I want someone to talk to. I also want to go on walks and watch movies with someone.

I had fun. I felt guilty. But mostly I’m talking it slow…I will see where it goes.

7 Responses to “A Date”

  1. Woody in Ohio Says:

    I know it might sound clichĂ© but I have been in the situation as you are in. I used to let the ghost of my late partners get between me and the man I was moving on with. Not good. I finally said to a “mister right type” that there was three people in the bed and I only want there to be two. He grinned and said he was going to show me how to do that. He first asked me if I wanted to really and truly commit to our relationship. I said yes. He said okay and now I am going to show you how I am going to make the third party go away. Show me he did! We both respected my past but the past became a memory that I soon locked away in my heart. You can do it, too. I lost three husbands over a 35 year period and it hurts, Really Bad, but that is life. Life is meant to be lived too the fullest. So get out there and live. If you are not careful all you are going to have left is nothing but regrets. You definitely do not want lonely days and nights filled with regrets. You might get disappointed along the way but you mark that up as a learning experience. Just be prepared because life comes at you fast, hits hard and sometimes it hurts. Sometime you got to compromise a little just don’t let it be a life of nothing but and you ending up with nothing. A little bit goes along way sometimes. Be careful. Be smart. Be true to yourself. Be safe. Above all else, Be Happy!

  2. Old Lurker Says:

    I think your approach is quite sensible.

    Do you feel your partner would have wanted you to have companionship after he was gone?

  3. Sixpence Notthewiser Says:

    Taking it slow is a good way to approach ‘dating again’.
    You don’t have to hurry, but you cannot live in the past. If he’s the man for you, he’ll stick around. And remember, your partner loved you. He wanted you to be happy…

    XOXO

  4. Sassybear Says:

    Congrats on taking a step towards moving forward. Why can’t you still love your late husband AND someone new? Who says you can only do one or the other? People love multiple pets, friends, children, and family members – loving another does not diminish the love for any other. Keep your memories and love, then add to them with someone new when you are ready. Anyone who truly loves/loved their partner would not want them to be lonely forever. I have no doubt you would have his blessing. Accept that and allow yourself to seek and enjoy companionship. And while there may be traces of sadness in finding someone new while retaining memories and feelings for your dearly departed, in time they will find their place side by side in our heart and mind. I wish you strength and peace and calm in your journey.

  5. Urspo Says:

    Good for you!
    Remember this is supposed to be fun, not a chore. good luck.

  6. Kirk Says:

    I wish you the best.

  7. Matt Says:

    Good for you, JM. I am glad it went well.

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